


In the Veil of Great Surprises

by auntieshakespeare



Series: The lovers, the dreamers, and me [6]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Best Friends, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Issues, Gay Disaster Shiro (Voltron), Gen, M/M, References to Illness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-31
Updated: 2018-12-31
Packaged: 2019-10-01 07:20:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17239901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/auntieshakespeare/pseuds/auntieshakespeare
Summary: Shiro and Adam tend to one last lingering hurt from Shiro's childhood in the moments before Shiro and Keith's wedding.





	In the Veil of Great Surprises

**Author's Note:**

> Minnowlet and I were exploring a fight Shiro and Adam might have had in our AU where everyone lives and it got a little 2real, so I had to bang out a fic to ease the pain. It's...still mostly emotional angst. Incredible.
> 
> Anyway, my usual pre-fic spiel: Everyone lives, Hunk and Adam are married (I'll write the fic that builds up to that...one day), and Adam has two moms.
> 
> Title from Sufjan Stevens "The Only Thing"

His hands are shaking. His whole life his hands have been shaking but now everything is fine so it shouldn't be a problem, it shouldn't be a problem, _Why can't you calm down, Takashi? TAKASHI--_

"Takashi?" 

Shiro jerks, ripping his hands off the half buttoned jacket he's been struggling with for what feels feels like forever. Adam lingers in the doorway, looking at him with a worried expression. "Pre-wedding jitters?"

"My hands won't stop shaking."

Adam snorts, "Ah, well I could pop you a Xanax, but then I'd be dragging your drooling ass down the aisle. Keith wouldn't be pleased."

Shiro sighs, looks down at his feet. "No, he wouldn't."

There's a hand on his shoulder, soft and familiar, "Okay, what's going on? You and I both know that Kogane is going to be blissed out of his pants no matter what shape you're in when you meet at the altar."

Shiro huffs, eyes still fixed on his shiny dress shoes, "You haven't called Keith 'Kogane' in years."

"Trying to work it in as many times as I can before he becomes a Shirogane, is that a problem?" The humor drops out of Adam's voice as he continues, "Takashi, you've been dopey with happiness since the engagement. Don't deflect. What's wrong?"

"My. My dad's not coming. He's not here."

The hand falls from his shoulder and Shiro looks up. Adam is staring at him like he's started speaking in Klingon, admittedly for good reasons. It's been fifteen years since Hiroshi Shirogane has seen his son and those years have been entirely by choice. Shiro licks his lips, running a shaky hand over his yet-to-be styled hair.

"Did y--"

"What am I doing?" he blurts, yanking on his hair before dropping his hands roughly into his abdomen. His arms clench and shake, muscles taut like they were when he was young and in the midst of a flare up, his prosthetic mirroring his left hand. "I'm getting married today! I'm finally gonna marry Keith and I should be imagining the way he's gonna look walking down the aisle or how he's gonna taste after cake and champagne but. I can't stop thinking about my dad!"

Adam's hands find his and they begin to rub a soothing rhythm into his wrists. He hums a little melody--Shiro thinks it may be from Sesame Street, a Hannah Weiss go to for stressed boys of all ages--and Shiro knows that's his cue to keep talking. To let it out.

"I never imagined getting married. You and I joked about it, running away and eloping, pushing me down the aisle in a wheelchair but that...that was dark humor. I never believed it."

"Sometimes a little bitterness is good for the soul." Adam quotes, smoothing out Shiro's hands and intertwining their fingers. Their foreheads touch and Shiro let's out a little puppy huff laugh. Deborah Weiss was the opposite of her wife in so many ways, and she preferred her humor, like her wine and chocolate, with a bitter edge.

Shiro rubs his finger over Adam's wedding band, closing his eyes. They've started swaying a little, forehead to forehead, hands clasped. "Right. But the point is, I never really believed it would happen. Even after you proposed for real I always figured..."

"That you'd die first."

The swaying stops. Shiro's chest is tight, eyes squeezed shut to hold back tears. His voice cracks a little as he says, "Loving you couldn't change my fate. I wanted you to be happy, to feel like we were going to have a life. But I. Being a husband never felt real. So I never let myself think about. it."

He opens his eyes. Tears fall fast, but through them Shiro finds no judgement. Warm brown eyes are filled with understanding and love, and maybe just a little pain. "You didn't think about how hard it would be to do this without your dad because you never thought you'd make it long enough for that to be a possibility." 

"Why didn't he love me, Adam? Why couldn't he even pretend to love me?" 

He's tucked into Adam's neck to sob, tears rapidly dampening the navy suit, no doubt smearing snot all over Adam's neck and oh, this is why, this is exactly--

Adam's chest rumbles against his own. "I don't know why your father is the way he is, but Takashi you don't deserve to be around someone who can only pretend to love you. I love you so damn much, as much as I love my mothers and Hunk--"

Shiro lets out another sob and Adam pulls back, cups Shiro's face. 

"It's true, I love you as much as I love my husband. It's a different love, but it's just as strong. Takashi in about thirty minutes you're gonna march your handsome ass out to that altar and look into the faces of a hundred people who love you and also Keith's friends from Hooters. Then you're gonna see your fiance, who loves you with an intensity that would scare anyone else. Then Allura's gonna say some words, Coran and Hunk are gonna cry, and the love of your life will be your husband. And at the end of it all you're going to know that it was perfect because it was filled with love, from beginning to end, no bullshit."

Shiro lets out one last sob, then wipes his face with his left hand, prosthetic flying off to procure a towel for the worst of the crying. There's a tugging on the front of his jacket as Adam buttons him up. His hand returns and he dabs at his face.

"Still fixing me up after all these years?" he asks, sniffing, and he means _Thank you for your love._

"You're hopeless without my special touch," comes Adam's reply, and he means _You're crazy if you think I would ever stop._

They share one last long look at each other before learning in, lips catching softly. It's brief, but grounding. He's here. He's alive. He's loved. In less than half an hour he's going to be married to the love of his life. He's gonna be okay.

Straightening his bow tie with steady hands, he lets out an exaggerated sigh and asks, "I don't suppose you could fix my hair?"

Adam snorts. "Already planned the whole wedding, might as well play your personal stylist too."

Shiro beams. 

Twenty-five minutes later, as he's being gently pried away from his husband's mouth, oxygen deprivation spots dotting his vision, Shiro has a revelation. There has been a lingering emptiness in his chest for years and he's tried to fill it with any affection he could. But now, pulling his husband back in for another searing kiss, he realizes why it never worked. 

Real love doesn't need to be asked for. It's always there. He just needed to believe it was his to accept. Pulled away from Keith's mouth yet again, he and his husband reach for each other simultaneously. He has no more doubts.

**Author's Note:**

> Unbeta'd also it's almost 5am where I'm at. Please forgive any egregious mistakes, I'll check for em later. Thanks for reading.
> 
> Ahhh for clarity's sake I should probably note that the remark about Keith having friends from Hooters is based on minnowlet and my theory that Keith has a very particular diet because he's autistic and it lends itself to Hooters food. Being that he has been madly in love with Shiro for his entire adult life and is gay AF Keith is a favorite of the waitresses at Hooters and naturally he invites them all to his wedding.


End file.
